I'm writing this at 6am in the morning, right after a night of partying because I feel inspired, and I don't want to wake up the next day forgetting these thoughts. I live in the moment, that's what I do. People always talk about how you should think about the future, but no matter how hard I try (or lie), I've always always lived in the present. To me, it's impossible to think about the future if I'm not even contented with my current situation.
For a long time now, I've lived my life for others. It was always about everyone else, and what they thought of me. I felt trapped, suffocated. I couldn't be my true self because I was rid of it a few years back, I lost myself in the process of becoming "Eunice Annabel''. Everything was about how I should be a good role model for younger girls, or how I should only be seen doing certain things or wearing certain clothes. It's so sad because it feels as though I'd spent the last few years creating a persona that isn't even who I genuinely am.
Over the last few days, I spent lots of time just living in the moment, and it felt so darn good to not have to think about what people thought of me, or how I should behave so that I could live up to their expectations. That's the thing, people tend to have some idealistic opinion on how I should be, or how I should talk. But enough is enough. I think I've suppressed my true self for way too long, and it's time that I embrace the real me.
I'm definitely someone who's a lot more confident, comfortable in her own skin, and perhaps a little more reckless. I also found out recently that I enjoy talking, so I guess I'm more open to welcoming new people in my life than I was before. You never know how much you can learn from a complete stranger until you give it a shot. The only way to improve yourself is if you get out of your comfort zone - so says a new friend of mine.
We've only got 5 months till we usher in a new year. Take my word; it's not worth it to live your life according to how people expect you to. At the end of the day, there's only enough space for one body in the coffin. The saddest thing in the world is growing old with regrets. Your life belongs to you alone, go out there and do whatever you want. Pursue your passion (if I could turn back time, I'll be a professional dancer now), take risks, ride the bungy, break up, travel, make mistakes, get a tattoo, take one more shot, confess to your crush, pluck up the courage and ask the girl out.
Always remember, go with the flow and make sure you're happy, that's all that matters. Do that, and you'll realise that life isn't that f*cked up after all :)
"All you need is twenty seconds of insane courage and I promise you something good will come out of it." - We Bought a Zoo
Have a fantastic weekend, this is only the beginning.
P.s. Whoever said #YOLO is lame needs to enjoy life a little.